Transforming Troubled Youth: How Writing And Storytelling Changes Lives

Today, I sit down with Janine Hernandez — a bestselling author, speaker, and founder of the Book Publishing Academy — to talk about the power of storytelling as a tool for mentoring troubled youth. Ms. Hernandez has dedicated years to helping people share their stories, from first-time authors to incarcerated teens. In this episode, we explore how giving young people the opportunity to write about their lives can not only heal them, but also inspire hope and second chances.

Ms. Hernandez shares her journey from writing her first book of poetry as a child to building a publishing business that has guided over 300 authors. She takes us behind the scenes of her latest and most ambitious project — an anthology featuring the voices of more than 100 teens from a juvenile detention center. Many of these stories reveal the deep trauma these youth have faced, from abuse and violence to family struggles and generational cycles. Through writing, they’re breaking their silence, confronting their past, and imagining a different future.

We also discuss the realities of mentoring at-risk youth — the trust that has to be built, the stigma they face, and the importance of showing them that change is possible. Ms. Hernandez opens up about her own childhood experiences, her faith journey, and how vulnerability has allowed her to connect deeply with the teens she mentors. Whether you’re a parent, educator, or community leader, this episode is a powerful reminder that one conversation, one opportunity, and one act of belief can change the trajectory of someone’s life.

https://janinehernandez.com/

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*Couple O' Nukes LLC and Mr. Whiskey are not licensed medical entities, nor do they take responsibility for any advice or information put forth by guests. Take all advice at your own risk.

Transcript

 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of Couples. As always, I'm your host, Mr. Whiskey, and one of the things we talk about on the show pretty often, a passion of mine is mentoring the youth, working with the youth, and the importance of it, not just as parents with children, but just as people who are gonna come across the youth in our lives.

We are all mentors in the sense of we all play a role in someone's life. We all. Inspire or influence people, whether we know or not. Now, stepping up and leading in mentorship is different. It's another layer of responsibility. It's that intention of actually going and doing it. And we are here with a guest today who is mentoring youth, not just any youth, but the troubled youth.

And what I see so often and what we've discussed on the show so often is that so many parents and mentors. Play the blame game. They make the child the source of all the problems. Instead of looking at, well, what has the child been through? What is the child going through? What is influencing their behavior?

And it's so important. And we're here with a guest today who has gotten down. To their level and spoken with them one-on-one and spend time with them understanding their stories. And today we're gonna focus on how sharing our stories and how the stories of the triple youth can teach us a lot, not just about them, but about ourselves as well.

So, Ms. Janine Hernandez, great to have you here. And could you please tell us a little bit about yourself? Hi. Thank you so much for having me. Uh, so yes, my name is Janine Hernandez. I am a mom to an amazing teenage boy. I am a number one bestselling author, a speaker, a book coach. I do a little bit of everything and I love it.

Um, yeah, that's a little bit about me. Yeah. And then just a brief overview about you run the Book Publishing Academy. Could you tell us a little bit about that? Yeah, so I founded the Book Publishing Academy about 10 years ago. Um, I got started off by coaching writers, one-to-one, helping them publish their books.

And right around the pandemic I switched to a group coaching mod model. And, uh, when everyone was going out of business because of the pandemic, my business went into business. 'cause everyone was. Home bored and they wanted to write books. Yeah. And, uh, we've grown to over 300 authors in the past, uh, since the pandemic, and it's just amazing, uh, amazing experience to help people share their story vulnerably through books and documentaries.

Yeah. So before you were helping others be authors, you yourself had to become an author first, right. So can you tell us a little bit about that journey? Oh, so I always knew since I was about nine years old, I would always tell my parents that I'm gonna grow up and become an author. That's like what I always knew since I was little.

And so I started writing my first book of poetry when I was 12 years old. And then, uh, but back in the nineties, I didn't know how to publish. There wasn't the same accessibility that we do now with social media or AI or anything like that. Um, so I just kept writing my book. But I had no idea what I was doing.

And then, uh, when I turned 24, I finally was able to publish my first book under the mentorship of two great friends. And, um, again, I still had no clue what I was doing. So I had to learn. I started to learn and go to coaching programs and different seminars, uh, to learn the industry. And then as I. Started writing books, people would just reach out to me and they're like, well, I wanna do that too.

And that's kind of how my business started was I just started helping people that would reach out to me. So what was the first book that you ever wrote or I'll say officially published because I'm sure from nine to on, you were writing little stories here and there and stuff, but what was the first book you published?

My first book is called Through My Eyes, and that was actually the stories that I started writing since from nine to like 25. So they're all poetry quotes, little short stories. Um, I finally, it took me a very long time, but I got it published. Okay. And I know you mentioned helping other authors publish their books, having over 300 authors, but how many books are you personally at now that are just your sole contribution?

I think it's nine, nine books. Um, and then we're working on It's good sign when You Lose Track. Yeah. And then we're working on an anthology book right now, so that'll be 10. And I'm currently writing a book behind the scenes. That one has been a very slow progress for about a year, so. That one will come soon.

Yeah. It's hard to write a book when you're helping like, you know, a hundred other people write books at the same time. It's like, I get that. But, uh, yeah. That's awesome. And, um, yeah, so I want to connect this to, I did a whole spiel in the beginning of the episode, which wasn't too long ago, about the youth in troubled youth.

What are you doing to incorporate writing and storytelling and the troubled youth, uh, specifically, I know you went on a. You from what I saw on your social media, uh, waited years for this opportunity that we're gonna talk about. So can you tell us kind of about those years of waiting and where this idea first originated?

Yeah, so I guess I'll, I'll give you some background on myself. So I grew up in a family where we would go to the state penitentiary on the weekends to visit aunts and uncles. And so I've been involved in just that lifestyle and growing up in it. And I always felt like I wanted to give back. And in so on social media, I also get, um, incarcerated people that will reach out to me saying, I wanna, I wanna publish a book.

But they, you know, they don't have the funds to do it. So I was like, okay, so there's a need there. How can I fulfill this need? And um, about two years ago, I did help a group of teams publish an anthology book. So most of them were high school teens, and then they did include probably about 20 kids from the juvenile detention center.

So I was like, okay, so these kids do have stories and they wanna share. And then, um, I would say about four years ago, God just planted in it in my heart and I started to feel that little pull of like, you need to help people in, you know, in the state penitentiary. And so it was something that I didn't.

Really, because when I get an idea, I'm like, okay, we're gonna go for it and we're gonna do it. And I have all the plan, but I just started praying about it. I would pray about it and I would think about it. And then, um, when the timing was right, it just landed on my lap. I got the opportunity, someone connected me to someone in the juvenile detention center, and then I was able to go teach them for a week and a half, which was an amazing.

Experience. Experience. And then now I'm helping, um, over a hundred of those kids publish a book, which is amazing. And they're excited about it too. So yeah, that's kind of how that happened. Is this an anthology with all of them or they each individually publishing a book? It's an anthology. So they're all getting their own chapter inside the book.

And it's going to be, you said 100 of them. Uh, it's over a hundred. I I, the last time, I mean, I was working on it. I think it's probably like 130 kids. Wow. Wow. So would you say that is gonna be the biggest anthology you've made so far? I would say yes. Yeah, it is actually, yeah. I would say that's a lot of people, a lot of chapters, and so.

Have you been able to kind of read through their stories yet, or just from talking with them? Kind of like when you, what, what's the age range on, on these children? They are between the ages of like. 13 to 17 right before they go to adult, um, jail. But, um, so these kids, I had the oppor, I gave them three choices.

I said, you can write about your life story about like, what, what made you get here to this point. You could write a poem or a song or a lyric. Uh, sorry. So those two op two options and, um, most of 'em decided to write about their life and what they did and. It was very interesting because I would say 98% of them, 99% of 'em.

Like you mentioned earlier, all of 'em had something traumatic that happened to them in their childhood that it just kind of snowballed and continued until their teenage years or something traumatic that happened to them that caused them to start acting out in different ways. And so, yeah, and I had the opportunity to.

Speak to a lot of 'em because they would ask me, they, they would call me Miss, miss, so Miss. And so I would go up to them and they would ask me like, can you read this? And kind of give me feedback. And, um, over the course of that week, I read every single one of them and gave them feedback, like, fix this, do this, you know, write a little bit here.

Giving them just writing feedback. And it, their stories are, it's so, I don't even know how to explain it. It is, um. Very heavy to read a lot of what they have gone through. And, um, I would say about 90% of them know that they want to get out of this lifestyle. They just don't know how, because it has become normal for them.

So, um, yeah, it was definitely an experience to be there with them and helping them write their stories. Yeah, I understand, you know, feeling that way, especially as a mother, you know, to, to see all these young people. And would you say what, what were some of the biggest issue? Was it just, um, fighting with the parents?

Was it, uh, financial hardship in the home? Was it not fitting in at school? A little bit of everything or? Can I be extremely transparent? How transparent? Yes. Okay. Um, so, um, uh, deep things like, uh, sexual abuse, uh, physical abuse in the home. Um. Uh, being a teen with murder charges, um, seeing, uh, someone getting murdered in front of them.

Uh, family members that are on drugs, but I mean like heavy, like fentanyl, meth, right? Then they end up doing it. Um, so it's not, it's not like, oh, I just had a parent that just was mean to me. And like, no, these are like traumatic, like someone got sexually abused, but, and the mom would allow it and kind of participate in it.

So just crazy. Like, I, I couldn't even fathom, fathom or wrap my, my head around some of the things that they were sharing that they went through. Um, yeah. Yeah. One of the things that's always kind of. Like shook me to the core on both my show and just in general, um, is the idea of the bystander family members when there's a member, especially a child being sexually abused in the family.

I've often heard the same thing where it's like my parents knew and they allowed it, or you know, my siblings knew and they allowed it or partook it, and that's always just like blown my mind and. Would you say it was, it was very alarming the amount of childhood sexual, like abuse and harassment that you, uh, read through or heard it.

Um, I would say honestly, sexual abuse was pretty low compared to more physical and drug related type of stuff. Um, but I will say to touch on that, just from my personal experience and educating myself on sexual abuse that, um, sometimes. The older generations are people pleasers and don't wanna ruffle feathers and they're, it, it really, it comes down to they protect the abusers because they don't want to a ruffle feathers or have like the family as a whole look that as a bad name.

And they rather protect the family than to like stand up for that child that got molested. Um, so it's, um. It's very horrible. No, it really is. I just got done recording an episode a couple minutes ago and it was on, you know, men who were sexually assaulted and harassment or experienced sexual violence.

Uh, and the statistics, we talked about how they changed from one in 17, uh, you know, a couple years ago to one in four. And the change was that originally, uh, the. Anything where a man had, uh, penetrated another individual, even if they did not consent or initiated, it was not considered, um, you know, rape or sexual assault.

So all men who had been roofied or taken advantage of while drunk, or drugs, if they had penetrated, it was not considered. And so you had all these, including children, uh, you know, children who were taken advantage of. If the children had penetrated. Uh, the other person who was. Technically the perpetrator, it was not classified as sexual assault or harassment and violence, which changed later on.

And like hearing that this morning just blew my mind that we would say, oh, well. If, if, if you penetrated but you weren't the initiator or the perpetrator, then we're just gonna like throw that case away. Like that, that blows my mind. And of course, um, another statistics shared this morning was that it's about, it takes about on average nine people to speak up against one perpetrator for that perpetrator to face justice.

So it is. You know, terrible. And it's even worse when it comes to, to children, you know? And like you said, a lot of them don't normally speak about it. I had a man on the show the other day who had been raped by his father, and I think, you know, decades past before he ever spoke about it. And he shared terribly that the first two therapists he spoke to about it kind of just.

Change subjects. Like he tried bringing it up and it was like, oh, we're not gonna talk about this. So, uh, I know it's hard for. Men to speak up about it, and then especially children as well. Um, and especially if you have bystander family members who are, you know, allowing it. How much are you going to trust an adult who isn't a family member, right?

Because your family's supposed to be your number one backbone and support system. So if I was a child, uh, you know, a child and I was sexually molested in some way, or experienced domestic violence and my family members don't have my back, well, what is this random teacher gonna do? Um, so I think it's important that we as non-family members make sure that, you know, even if the family members aren't doing something, that we're gonna do something.

But what would you say are some lessons that, that we could take away from what you read through and, you know, learned as parents or as you know, family, friends, or even bystanders? I think, um, I can speak too, from my experience, because I'm a mother is. Everything that we do. It has an effect on our children.

And so it's unfortunate because a lot of us, um, maybe we go through some traumatic experience in our childhood and we don't start to really understand it till we're older. We're thirties or forties. Really start to heal from it. But by that time, our kids are already like 10, 15, you know what I mean? So they, they went through it kind of with us as we were going through all of the trauma responses and dealing with the pain and masking it and not going and, and filing reports on sexual abusers or abusers, et cetera.

And so I think. It's hard because when you're in it and you, you're a parent and you have a trauma response and or you're still in that type of like chaos, it's really hard. But I would say go and get help because anything that we do is gonna affect those children and. Sometimes it might just be too late.

You know, by the time that we figure it out, our kids are already 15, 16, they're already grown. They've already been implanted with all the things that we showed them or exposed them to when they were little. Yeah. And same with, um, you know, I've done a lot of episodes on veterans and PTSD and a lot of them not dealing with it until they're 50, 60, 70.

Like you said, their children had to experience all the side effects of that already and now. Well, what's interesting even is, um, I did an episode that I thought was pretty unique on the generational trauma of Holocaust survivors. And not just like, how did the Holocaust affect those people, but how did it affect their children and their grandchildren?

And like the case studies on that where, I mean, it was just amazing episode to see like the generational impact we have, um, in our own healing and, and journey, like you said. Um. I had a guest once say that children are like sponges and I really like that, uh, analogy that they are just picking up everything around them.

Everything you do, you know, the amount of relationship experts who have come on my show and talked about like what our children witness in our parents' relationship is what will tend to mimic or go toward to the point that some people. Seek out toxic relationships because their parents had a toxic relationship and that's normal to them.

So it's, it's so interesting. And what can you say about, I mean, reaching these trouble, what do you think you're giving them a chance to share their story? What can you say about second chances and, you know, like their desire to want to like live a new life and not knowing how to, like what can we do to help, you know, de-stigmatize the idea that, you know, juvenile delinquents are set up for nothing but failure.

Yeah, it's really unfortunate because I would say there are a small few that I met that are like. Eh, it's, it is what it is. This is my life, and there's no getting out of it, and there's no really escaping my family too, because they can't just estrange themselves from the environment. But most of 'em know that they need help.

And they want help and they wanna get better and they have big dreams. And then when I came in and I spoke to them, and I talked to them about all the things that I went through when I was a child and even as an adult, and then I showed them my books and all the successful things that I was able to accomplish, they were like.

Mind blown. 'cause they're like, we could do that too. I'm like, yes you can. There are illegal ways to make money. There are things that you can do to be a better person. Right. So, um, honestly I think it's just really pouring into the youth. Um, like, like just like I went into the juvenile detention center or whether it be nonprofits that speak with them, um, because they're in their most vulnerable space when they are teenagers.

Because they're getting older, they have a lot of emotions and they're starting to understand these kids are so smart, like they understand everything that happened to them and they're learning how to cope with it too. And I'm honestly very, um, proud of them because, I'll give you an example. Like me, it took me 38 years to finally truly authentically share my story without being afraid of what my family thinks.

And some of these kids are 14 and they're like, this is what I went through. And they were so vulnerable and so open. Um, so I think we really just need to help them as much as we can. And would you say because of what you've been through, you were able to build kind of trust with them a lot more easily by being vulnerable and kind of showing that y'all were, were pretty similar.

Yeah, I, I definitely think, uh, me sharing my story of sexual abuse of, uh, physical abuse. I also talked about how I would go visit my uncle and my aunts in state penitentiary on the weekends. Um, so like sharing all of that, I talked about how I got kicked out of high school for fighting. Like I, I was very open with them, right?

And then I would play music too, so I can, I, I have. Teenager. So I would like to think that I'm a cool mom. So they all looked at me and they're like, wow, she's really cool. Like, you know, so they would share even more with me. They didn't see me as like this strict adult. They saw me as like, oh, she's really cool miss, like we could really talk to you.

So, um, I think that helped build that trust with them. Whereas I think if I would've gone in there and I have no life experience, they probably would've shut down on me. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And I. Would, so how would you encourage people to kind of connect with the, the troubled youth? Uh, you know, would you say, I know you mentioned like nonprofits and other stuff, like reaching out to these juvenile delinquent centers and seeing like what we can do to reach them or what kind of programs they have available.

Yeah, so definitely the juvenile detention center, reaching out to them. Um, you do have to go through some sort of background clearance to, to get approved to go in there and help. Yeah. But that is an option, I would say nonprofits that help troubled youth as well. Or sometimes even just contacting schools.

Schools love to have speakers come in and talk to the kids. So, um, that is an avenue as well. Um, but anything that you can do, I think even kids that might not have, like, they didn't have a crazy upbringing, but they still have, you know, things that they go through. My boyfriend broke up with me, or I had a friend, a fight with a friend, and they don't know how to talk to their parents about it, but sometimes they trust a different adult, you know?

Yeah. And you had mentioned early in episode, God, what is your relationship with faith like and what has that played in all of this? Uh, my relationship and my faith has definitely grown over the past couple years after I, so I grew up Catholic, uh, went to Catholic school and then, um, I don't know, I just never was a believer.

It was one of those things where I would go to church and I'm like, well, I don't believe that, and how is that possible? I questioned it a lot, and then I converted to Christianity. And, but even then I was still very one foot in, one foot out. Like, Hmm, I don't know that I'm a believer of this, but I'm gonna go to church because it makes me feel good, but I'm gonna still drink on the weekends and get drunk and go to church hungover.

That's how I was. And then it wasn't until, um. I would say about two years ago I was in a physically abusive relationship and in this relationship my abuser introduced me to God on a different level. And um, so I started to read the Bible, but he would spiritually abuse me as well. He would use the Bible and scriptures and God against me to abuse me.

And it's crazy because the very thing that he used to abuse me is the very thing that God used to get me closer to him. So I went through a really dark period where because of the abuse that I was having or getting, um, I wanted to unlive myself. And it's like, it was like the spiritual warfare. I would see the darkness.

Literally I could see it and I can feel it, and then I could see God over here, like, you don't wanna go down that path. And um, I finally ended up leaving that relationship and my relationship with God got even stronger and I started to see that everything that I had been praying for, God wanted to give it to me, all of my desires.

And, um. I also realized that God was with me along the whole the way. You know, I just had to go through a lot of different things to get to where I'm at. I would go through it all again, just so I can end up here with God. So, um, yeah, it's been, it's been a journey and God just continues to surprise me. I keep, like, every day I pray and I'm just like, I can't believe this.

I can't believe this is my life right now because this is what I've been praying for. You know what I mean? So I'm a contributing author for a book coming out on October 4th. Check it out. But, um, originally what I wrote about was just, uh, religious weaponization, uh, because my father had, uh, like, like my story's kind of similar to yours in the sense that my father always twisted and weaponized religion to.

Lift himself up and put others down. And he used to say that when I was born, you know, Satan in the Legion wanting to name me Damien, that I was gonna be the antichrist. And there's a lot of times in my life where, you know, and, and people often question like Mr. Whiskey, why would he ever believe you were the antichrist?

Again, like we talked about, when you grow up, what your parents say have a different. Authority to it, right? I mean, you believe your parents know everything they made you. Right? Um, and so growing up being told that I was gonna be the antichrist, that, um, you know, I was evil and that, um, there's a spiritual warfare going on over me like no other person, you know, it really affected me.

But ironically enough because, and I thank God all the time for this because I'm such a intellectually curious person and, and very driven to, to truth and to facts, you know? I went and read the Bible because, you know, my dad would always say X, Y, Z, and I was, I got tired of it to the point where I read the Bible and now it's like every time he says something, um, you know, I'm at the point where I can quote verbatim.

I'm like, well actually he says this, you know, this, this, this. And um, you know, so now. And that's one of the things too. So many people suffering from church hurt from hypocrisy. From blasphemy in in their communities or from spiritual warfare and suffering at the hands of someone who is weaponizing religion.

Part of the foundation of being able to fight back. Isn't just having faith, but it's actually knowing the word. Because when you know the words, people can't twist it on you. You know? It's, it's just like a courtroom battle, you know, when you've got the law right there and you, you see the actual words, you know?

So for me it was the same thing where the person who used religion against me is actually what fueled my relationship with God and, and, and learning into it. So it is so. Interesting how sometimes, you know, we come to God. But I, I love one of my favorite quotes from the Bible. It's from Genesis. It's when, um, all of Joseph's brothers find him in Egypt during the.

The famine and they're like, oh no, he is gonna kill us. He's gonna hate us. And what he says to them is, and this is not verbatim, but he says to them, what you intended for sin? God intended for the blessing and salvation of many, you know, uh, and people paraphrase it as whatever, you know, the enemy intend for evil, God can use for good.

And I, I truly believe that, you know, um, so many, so much of, of my trauma has been used to help other people. And, uh, now do I wish for a world where. No one experienced trauma and we were all happy and living good life for sure. Um, but I am very thankful that. A lot of the people who have trauma are using it to help others.

And I think that's why it's important to have platforms like mine and platforms like yours where we give people a chance to share their story, whether it's through podcasting or writing or whatever it is. And I think writing is an especially powerful platform because what you have, which we haven't mentioned, is a unanimity sometimes.

I'm sure you've had some authors who say, Hey, I don't want my real name used. I want an author name. Or, Hey, you know. I want to tell my story, but kind of vaguely, you know? So I think it's very, very powerful being able to share our stories. Yep. It is, it's, and it, I love that quote too because, or that verse, because it's so true.

It's like the thing that was supposed to tear you down ends of being the thing that brings you closer to God. And I do believe that our trauma, our childhood, all the things that we went through is really what helps us bring people closer to God. So. Like I said, I will go through it again just so I could be here in this space, in this moment.

Yeah. And um, we're gonna have janine hernandez.com in the description below for everyone to check out. Um, but. The reason I'm ending it early is because you and I will be recording in person together pretty soon here, so we'll go more into detail on stuff and, uh, you'll get to share about one of your books coming out that you've helped other authors put together.

Uh, so we'll, we'll be meeting again. But today I want to have you on just to talk about, you know, the troubled youth. 'cause I do think it's so important we reach them because, I mean, you know, there's a lot of pressure put on you, but you know, Ms. Hernandez, you're meeting with them maybe what actually changed their lives, you know, that day that set them on the right path.

And so it's so important to know. You know, they call it the butterfly effect, dominoes, however you wanna put it. The impact we have in people's lives, like one conversation can change everything. Like my, everything I do with speaking, with addiction recovery, with suicide prevention, all that is traced back to a single conversation had on an aircraft carrier.

And it was about a joke. It was a joke that was trending on the internet and that conversation. Snowball down into what is here today. And so same with you. Having them, you may be the first time they ever opened up their story to someone, and now they have been empowered to continue to share their story, to not be ashamed of it, and to use it for good.

So I think it's so important that not just you, Ms. Hernandez, but everyone realizes that they have that same power in their hands with every single person they meet every day. It's very rewarding to see that you can help other people through their pain. Yeah. So thank you for coming on the show today and sharing about what you've done recently.

I hope it was inspiring to others. And like I said, we're gonna have you back on, we're gonna take some pictures together. You'll probably have a cowgirl hat on and all that. Mm-hmm. So, so, so it'll be a good time. I can't wait. Thank you so much for having me. I truly appreciate it.